Ever get the feeling...

...that those around you are just putting up with you? Like you're the annoying little sister who gets indulged simple because that's easier than the alternative? Like those around you wouldn't exactly be upset if you just...moved on? Disappeared? I don't mean in the suicide sense, but just out of their lives and hair.

Well, that's kinda how I'm feeling right now. Got myself worked up in a depressive funk and thinking back on RPs I've been a part of...and just feeling like people in those RPs didn't really want to be playing with me, but were too polite to say that to me. And to a smaller extent, I'm kinda starting to feel that way about the one RP I can say I'm currently active in (more or less).

At least senior year of high school I knew I didn't belong in any of the groups. Not even the drama-punk/goth clique that used the same free-time hideouts I did and that I had advanced theatre with.



And sorry 'bout the emo post. I probably wouldn't be feeling like such a failure at life, the universe, and everything if my body would fracking shut down and let me sleep! (Couple hours sleep the night before, plus no daytime naps, plus inability to get to sleep when you know you have to be up again in a few hours is not good on the psyche.)